Grief

 “Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow, but this same necessity of loving serves to counteract their grief and heals them.” 

                                                                                                                                       ― Leo Tolstoy

“Love is an engraved invitation to grief.”
― Sunshine O'Donnell, Open Me

“Each of us has his own rhythm of suffering.”
― Roland Barthes

Apparently the best way for me to communicate my feelings this past week is through quotes.

I will never forget Wednesday. 

It was a wonderful/sad/tying/horribly painful day.

I am not ready to relive those events via blog however I will share a small miracle of that day soon.

This past week rocked my spirit. 

My grief has been something no one, let alone me at this time is/was ever prepared for. 

My home has been an abnormally quite. 

It sounds in some moments, like torture. 

It feels like something is missing around every corner I turn.

Believe it or not when 90lbs isn't leaning on you every chance he gets you notice it when it's gone.

I am really really hating being alone.

Finn is eating sporadicly and oddly I can't stop eating.

(Yep lucky me I am an emotional eater) 

The worst part?

I keep losing it out of the blue.

I will accidentally call him and then there is nothing and I fall off my rocker.

It sucks.

I know it will all pass but it is going to take some time.

On a brighter note. 

It is amazing the people that are in my life. 

Thank you to all of you.

Sincerely.

It has been amazing all of the texts, emails, Facebook posts, tweets, and even flowers that have been delivered. 

I have loved seeing how so many people loved Hank. 

I didn't realize how many people in my life loved him and got to have some really great memories with him. 

It has been so heart warming.

On that note. 

I hope that this next week is a little brighter and that Finn and I both find our happier sides again. 

I am pretty sure that is that exact thing my "smiling pup" would want and expect out of us anyway!

Thank you again to all of you.

I have felt all of you love and it has been wonderfully healing.

xoxo.