Most days I like to keep my blogs short and sweet. Not because I think that is how blogging should be done but mostly because I feel that my writing skills need some serious help. I know that is a fact. Brad used to pride himself on finding my mistakes and Christin at one point couldn't' help herself from calling to tell me what I need to correct the moment she read the latest blog post.
Today however, I couldn't care less.
Maybe it is because I spent most of the day at home reading. It has been months since I sat with a good book and just lost myself in another world.
It also might be because I have spent most of my time lately working. When I work this much I loose my desire to let my creative juices flow. Actually, I loose almost all desires for anything. But sleep.
I wrote a letter to a dear friend tonight about how I am really struggling to find my purpose in life. I mentioned how I thought by now, being 27, I would have been some Molly Mormon wife with two kids living outside of Provo with a white picket fence. I also mentioned how God must really know me because I feel if I were really there I might of killed myself.
There are somedays where I want my soulmate to show up. Yes, I am talking about the SM... or his successor. (I don't believe he will ever cross my path again. Mostly due to our last encounter and my stupidity) But, there are also far more days where I dream of seeing the world. There are nights where I wander home on the mountain trails far past dark and entirely alone. There are glasses of wine that I have indulged in where that glass, my wine, and freshly pedicured feet make me the happiest girl in the world.
So who knows.
School.
Family.
Travel.
Photography.
Friends.
Work.
My purpose?
I have yet to really find that last one. But for the meantime I am eagerly interested in sharing it with who ever will read it.
The past few days once again I was reminded that there are many more of you who read this than I know. I again thank you for your interest in my little journey though life.
In the next few months I am hopefully going to be trying to chase some bigger dreams and shake up my bucket list.
If my blogs turn more to short stories than a botch at photo journalism. Forgive me.
I am just amateur an after all.
2 comments:
Psh you can write anything in your blog that you want - photojournalism is overrated. I hope you do find your "purpose", something that makes you truly undeniably happy. Because you really deserve that.
Hey Bridget-
I am sorry you are having such a hard time with the menfolk, and purpose in life stuff. Sometimes in an aimless journey you end up at the right destination, (but don't look to hard, its most likely right in front of you) so good luck with that! As for the guy thing, I cant really speak as one that knows any better. When my wife and I were dating she wanted to wring my neck half the time. I have come to the conclusion that one of the main purposes in life is figure out how to live peaceably with the opposite sex. But I don't think this actually occurs until the eternities
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