Dumb and Dumber

Lately I am not into dating.

At all.

Yes, I have mentioned that I live in the most delicious place where the men to women ration is eight to one and is crawling with eligible bachelors but as of late these so called men are not grabbing or holding my attention.

Why do I bring this up you ask?

Well here is the story.

Being a bartender in two fairly busy bars in a small town I do meet quite a few people. Every so often I become not just their bartender but somewhat of a friend to these folk. A few guys in particular have sparked a conversation with me more than once that has now led to this blog post.

I don't really know how we got on to the topic of dating in PC but we did. In the process I started telling them what I really thought of all of my potential prospects and the tactics they are attempting to use to swoon me.

Here in no particular order are ways to get me (or any other woman) NOT to go out with you. Ever.

- Get belligerently drunk, ask me for my number, (get denied) come back to the bar the next day and introduce yourself as if we never met.

- Realize that half the reason you are in a small ski town is because you are running towards a girl, from a girl, or because of a girl. This leads to me asking, "Why are you sitting here with me in the first place?"

- Get my number in another way other than asking me for it.

-Facebook stalking.

(As in trying to add me as a friend before you left the barstool in front of me)

- After getting my number having every conversation with me via text. Seriously! How hard is it to hit the call button and use your voice.

- Asking me out and wanting me to pick out the place, plan the date, drive, and pay. Yes, I can appreciate you are a ski bum but really did your mom not teach you any manners?

-Not showering.

- Coming to the bar every.single.day. and getting blitzed.It's called AA. I can appreciate that you drink but not that much.

- Choosing your 420 habit over life.

- Hitting on my mom in front of me then asking me out... YES, this has happened... more than once.

- Pretending to be interested in something I do and then not want to do it with me.

- Ripping on the Sox while I am watching the game.

- Lastly saying you are going to so something or call and then not doing it. That shows pretty much right away that you are just not that into me and I am no longer going to waste my time.

Yes, in the past two months all of these have happened. Which, then leads me to accept that I am perfectly happy at the moment with out any of these men by my side.

I mean really? Who wants to be the Dumber to their Dumb?