Because It's Christmas...

This Christmas season was rough on me.

You see.

Last year I was loathed for putting my tree up the day after Halloween.

This year I currently have 3.. yes.

3 trees up and decorated in my home all of which got up right before Brad came.

Last year I hand made all of my gift wrap and name tags.

This year.

Store bought Wal-Mart (except on Christin's present) wrap and a Sharpie are covering the gifts I am giving.

Last year I went to more holiday parties than I can count.

Even threw one myself.

This year.

Not a single one.

Christmas Eve last year...

laughing and beer pong with my family.

This year.

Most of the day was sick in bed followed by a complete breakdown at my mom's.

Needless to say, finding the Christmas spirit didn't come so easy this year.

Until now.

It is 2:21 in the morning and I am sitting under the glow of our wonderful little tree exchanging texts with both Brad and Christin and finally getting to feel that holiday spirit I have been lacking for weeks.

Maybe it is seeing all the presents that Santa brought.

Or feeling so overly stuffed from dinner.

Maybe it is having a little late night chat with my mom.

Or having a best friend who will talk with me for the next hour on the phone.

Tonight as I wait to wake up to the excitement of an 8 year old munchkin in the house,

and knowing that this Christmas morning there will be all the love in the world around me,

maybe this feeling... even though a little late,

will hang around through the New Year.

Not because I have been missing it in the previous weeks,

but maybe just because it's Christmas.

And this is the one time of the year...

lonely or not...

that we should get to feel the love all around.

I hope all of you dear friends and family know how much I love and miss you and think about you.

Know you are all loved.

And that there is a place for you in my home and in my heart!

Merry Christmas!